Key events
47th over: Ireland 190-6 (McBrine 15, Adair 12) Tongue mostly continues with the short stuff, and McBrine pulls rather elegantly to the fine leg boundary.
Hi Tanya. Jeremy Boyce, hello! “I am “enjoying” the barrel shoot commentary, but not so much the England boys’ choice of headgear. Unlike their Test cricket, they are just slightly behind the wave there, the return of the bucket hat was last summer, all the cool people have moved on now that you can get them in M&S and Top Shop. Hope they didn’t get too many manufactured for the merchandising options ?”
“As it goes, in cricket, the cap is the preferred option (even when bowling, see G Boycott), and there is frankly no smarter piece of headgear in the game than the Baggie Green. It never changes, and neither does the level of intensity in their Ashes teams. A new hat does not necessarily guarantee success, their cricket is not about following fashion, it’s about BEING fashion. Or perhaps the England boys are hoping to get this one done with in time to go and join the Man Cit£h fans up at Wembley, where they can all bucket hat together in perfect harmony ?”
46th over: Ireland 184-6 (McBrine 9, Adair 8) Joe Root gets some ping – two glorious cover drives for four by McBrine, before Adair slams him for six and then sweeps four more.
45th over: Ireland 165-6 (McBrine 1, Adair 2) Apologies, I was wrong about Tongue’s beard that with a closer look isn’t a complete circle but a moustache on the top list and a semi-circular beard under the chin. Unsure if this has a name. Anyway, he has been instructed to send down some chin music, and duly does, fast and with some venom. Adair and McBrine survive.
Phil Sawyer, hello! “Currently stuck on a packed National Express coach for eight hours”… many sympathies…” due to lack of trains, which is as much fun* as it sounds. Anyway, I find it curious that so many cricket lovers bemoan the death of test cricket but decry attempts to widen the range of nations playing it. How else are new nations going to experience the standard they need to reach? Others have had to go through these growing pains: New Zealand, Bangladesh, England 1998…. “
44th over: Ireland 163-6 (McBrine 0, Adair 1) Root collects a wicket for his stash, and with James McCollum unable to bat, England have just three more wickets to take.
WICKET! Campher c Stokes b Root 19 (Ireland 162-6)
Three balls later, Campher is gone too, sweeping to short fine leg where Ben Stokes takes the ball with bended knees and in obvious pain. He throws the ball away and hobbles to celebrate. Ooof, he doesn’t look like a man ready to bowl, or run quick singles.
43rd over: Ireland 162-5 (Campher 19) Tector can’t believe that of all the places to cut Josh Tongue, he picked out Brook. He leans over his bat in despair before trudging off. Had just received a standing ovation from a Saturday-happy Lord’s crowd.
WICKET! Tector c Brook b Tongue 51 (Ireland 162-5)
Just after reaching a super fifty, Tector guides a wide fat one from Tongue into Harry Brook’s tummy at backward point, who grabs it second time.
42nd over: Ireland 158-4 (Tector 48, Campher 18) With Leach off the pitch, it is Root again, still as boyish as ever. No fireworks and just one off the over.
“Morning Tanya, hope all’s good with you.” Hello Tom Hopkins!
”I feel like England are really missing Jimmy in this Test. Surely someone of his age and experience could have let them know that bucket hats were a rubbish look the first time around are are in no need of a revival?”
Agreed, very tricky to pull off. Even 1930s matinee idol Ollie Pope looked like a mushroom this morning. A floppy hat a la Shane Warne is so much more forgiving.
41st over: Ireland 157-4 (Tector 47, Campher 18) After drinks, Josh Tongue takes up the attack – with the news that Jack Leach has gone off the pitch, and has not returned. Tongue wears a slight brown beard in a semi-circle from lip to chin. Campher isn’t perturbed by the change in bowling and drives Tongue for successive boundaries – an overpitched half volley is sent through the cover, the next mishit through mid-on.
“Afternoon from sunny Mallorca, your Tanyaship.” Do go on Sean Clayton.
“There may be more precise phrases ‘as Gaelige’ but in Hiberno-English, nothing would sum up a collapse better than “Well, that’s the innings thoroughly banjaxed”…
40th over: Ireland 148-4 (Tector 46, Campher 10) Ben Stokes puts his hand in the Bazball lucky dip and pulls out Joe Root. Campher plonks and swings, smashing the ball into the Grand Stand where it is taken smartly by a guy in a red tie and shades. He takes a little bow. Drinks.
David Warner to retire at the New Year Sydney Test
39th over: Ireland 139-4 (Tector 43, Campher 4) Potts does get another, he’s a perfect highly-skilled workhorse – no long brittle limbs or knobbly knees. Just a single.
And in Ashes related news, David Warner has announced his retirement at the Sydney New Year Test – should he be picked.
38th over: Ireland 138-4 (Tector 42, Campher 4) Campher off the mark with an agricultural hoick off Leach. Tries to replay the shot and nearly loses his off stump.
37th over: Ireland 133-4 (Tector 41, Campher 0) A good stint by Potts this morning, nearly time for a rest. Just a single off the over.
36th over: Ireland 132-4 (Tector 40, Campher 0) Tector eyes up Leach, and takes him on, bashing him straight down the ground. Stokes looks pleased, Lord’s, a picture. A tantalising bottle of Sauvingnon blanc is being passed around in the Mound Stand.
Writes Tom Vd Gucht: ”I was trying to work out a Bazball 11 to send to James Wallace on the OBO yesterday, but got sidetracked when drawing up my list and reminiscing about how extraordinary players like Flintoff, Botham, KP etc were as they stood out fron the crowd and the norm. Does Bazball risk demeaning and reducing the impact of such exploits if they’re simply the norm? A bit like spoiling a quality TV show by bingewatching 47 episodes in a single weekend and it all blurs into one making you miss the nuances and subplots developing.”
Oooh, interesting idea. I feel you still have the top Bazballers rising to the top even in a Bazball era. And the Bazballers of old stand tall
35th over: Ireland 127-4 (Tector 35, Campher 0) Just a leg bye off Potts.
34th over: Ireland 127-4 (Tector 35, Campher 0) Shame that for Ireland, who had looked confident in the first 40 minutes. Excellent work by Leach once more. On TMS, Andy Zaltzman tells us that – should he not bowl again today – Ben Stokes will be the only Test captain in history not to bat or bowl in the match.
WICKET! Tucker b Leach 44 (Ireland 126-4)
Leach makes the breakthrough with his second ball as Tucker tries to sweep, gets down on his knees, but misjudges and gloves the ball onto the stumps. He gets a hearty and deserved round of applause for his efforts this morning. seven boundaries and a soupcon of up yours.
33rd over: Ireland 126-3 (Tector 35, Tucker 44) Potts is making things happen: diving full length to his left in an attempt to collect a chip from Tucker. Got in wishing distance. Behind the stumps, Bairstow fumbles a ball deflected off the pads.
“The last three Test innings against Ireland are 591/6d, 704/3d and 524/4d,” writes a stern Marcus Abdullahi. “In other words, they are conceding 140 runs per wicket. This is not good. In fact, it is not good at all.”
32nd over: Ireland 122-3 (Tector 34, Tucker 42) After Tucker drives him for four, Broad tries to wheedle a new ball off umpire Wilson, but he isn’t having any of it.
31st over: Ireland 116-3 (Tector 33, Tucker 37) Four to Tucker off Potts but not controlled, squared up and squeezed through the slips. But he’s got the taste, and flicks four more, fancy, wristy, to bring up the fifty partnership. Tector admires from the other end, yet to add to his overnight score.
“Good morning your Tanyaship!” I like your style Tone White, please contact my children.
”My son, the only family member who follows
Cricket, which he does with the aid of a television set, tells me how curious and charming it is to hear comments and assessments given with an Irish accent. Any chance you could provide some written brogue?
And what is Irish colloquial for a collapse – should one happen?
I’m counting on England having to bat again on day five!”
My lovely Irish sister in law would definitely not appreciate my attempts at brogue.
30th over: Ireland 107-3 (Tector 33, Tucker 28) Shot of the day by Tucker, who eyes up a wide one from Broad and slips out the most glorious cover drive for four, all perfect posture and tail coat style.
29th over: Ireland 102-3 (Tector 33, Tucker 23) Potts runs in ox-strong. Beats Tector with a beauty fifth ball that skims past the defensive bat, missing by a smooch. And another next ball that fizzes, darts and wobbles so much that Bairstow can’t take it cleanly behind the stumps.
“Good morning Tanya. What a beautiful day.” Hello Kim Thonger. And yes, perfect June.
“I think the Irish captain is perfectly positioned, if he acts swiftly, to take the following action. Declare now. Hold an after match press conference claiming that technically it is not an English victory but an Irish tactical concession, honours are in fact even, and then if every Irishman in the world continues to repeat that mantra in every bar in the world forevermore, it will gradually become the truth.”
28th over: Ireland 101-3 (Tector 33, Tucker 22) At the Nursery end, we have Stuart Broad, bandana in place. Ollie Pope vigorously polishes the ball on his trouser leg. Jack Lynch mooches to himself and Stokes makes significant hand signals. A noball and a legbye take Ireland into three figures. Broad appeals vigorously for an lbw against Tucker but no-one else is that interested.
27th over: Ireland 99-3 (Tector 33, Tucker 22) Potts starts with a legside drifter that brings a leg bye. A single to Tucker and careful defence all round.
An email wings in and settles, all the way from Australia. Hello Ben Stechler!
“Hello there, Englishman living in Melbourne here.
”Interested to hear your/everyone’s thoughts on whether this warm up game for a big Ashes series is the right one…yes, plenty of chance to check out new personnel, but not sure if it’s a true reflection of their skills. We know the usual suspects have the talent to deliver, but it would have been good to see the gang tackle some, shall we say ‘more established’ opposition. With the Aussies facing India and getting a good look at form, is this more a morale boosting endeavour for England or valuable time out on the pitch?”
”Here’s to Jimmy’s fitness.”
I’ll leave that hovering for a minute as the players are out, short sleeved polyester sweaters for England, short sleeved woolies for Ireland.
I am at least two days behind with my hat observations – apologies, blaming half term.
Emma John’s lovely piece just got a shout out by Athers during a mini Cricket Writers on TV section in front of the Lord’s pavilion.
Great to see new faces Sonia Twigg of the Independent and Nathan Johns of the Irish Times alongside Mike Atherton and Mark Butcher.
Hello Nick Way, whose email is titled “Bucket Hats.”
“With these bucket hats harking back to the 1990s, perhaps it should be renamed Bezball.”
Very good!
Injury to James McCollum
Bad news for James McCollum, injured last night, who is now wearing an orthopaedic boot and, according to a statement from Cricket Ireland, unlikely to bat.
“James underwent assessment and imaging last night at a nearby orthopaedic hospital. X-rays have revealed no fracture is present and we are awaiting on the reports from his MRI which is likely to show injury to his ligaments.
“He is currently in an orthopaedic boot and crutches and it is unlikely that he will take any further part in the match.”
Ollie Pope is being interviewed by Ian Ward. He’s very chirpy. He’s also wearing a blue England branded bucket hat. Very Madchester 1990. Is this a new bit of kit, part of the Bazball uniform? Apologies if I’ve missed something.
Preamble
Good morning! So we made made it to day three – much to the relief of the MCC, team OBO, the Ireland XI and my cousin Matt, who is going to Lord’s for the first time since he was a very little boy. This has been something of a steamrollering by England, playing a second-choice(ish) bowling XI but blistering along in the same merry way.
Lots for us to enjoy though, from Ollie Pope reaching his double century with a six to Stuart Broad’s five-fer and three wickets for debutant Josh Tongue as the shadows stretched last night.
Not so fun for Ireland, but they now have a Lord’s Saturday, and presumably a full house, to bask in. Tector and Tucker have an unbroken stand of 34 under their belts. Bat out the first hour, till lunch, till drinks …
I’m off to wheeze round parkrun with a friend, in the chatting not racing section. Back with coffee half an hour or so before play starts at 11am BST. See you then!
